


Smoke and Mirrors

by TinkerBella



Category: NCIS: Los Angeles
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-16
Updated: 2013-11-16
Packaged: 2018-01-01 17:16:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,885
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1046444
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TinkerBella/pseuds/TinkerBella
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This is basically Smart Deeks being Smart.  And Hetty decides to test everyone for IQ levels and memory skills.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Smoke and Mirrors

Sam chuckled to himself as he listened to Deeks rattling off baseball statistics. The blond Detective was on a roll and even Sam had to admit it was pretty impressive. 

Kensi looked more irritated than impressed, as she interjected, "How do you even know all that? Or, better question, why?"

Deeks made a face. "I told you. I'm good at remembering things. A skill you, obviously, lack since you don't remember me telling you that. But a skill that comes in extremely handy in law school. I aced the Bar Exam first time out."

"Then threw it all away to become a cop." Sam felt the need to put that out there.

"I'm still a practicing lawyer," Deeks countered, looking a bit smug. No way I'm letting my license slide."

Kensi looked doubtful. "When do you have time to practice law? As it is you already, technically, have two jobs."

Deeks shrugged. "I do wills. About half a dozen or so a year. Keeps my fingers in the pie, so to speak."

"You do wills?" Kensi sounded so surprised it was almost insulting.

"I'm a lawyer. Of course I do wills." Deeks was affronted. 

Sam didn't say anything, as Kensi defended herself and Deeks rebuttalled, but he made a mental note to talk to the Detective at a later date. He and Michelle had wills in place, but there were some things he wanted to make sure were taken care of that were of a more personal nature. Sam knew he could trust Deeks with those things, beyond the attorney-client confidentiality.

Before anything more could be said about the subject, Eric appeared on the top of the stair, fingers in mouth. The shrill whistle made everyone wince and they headed for the stairs before the Tech Analyst could speak. He looked disappointed as he followed them all into Ops.

"We've been asked to look into an ongoing case," Hetty announced, from where she stood before the view screen. "As a favor. Therefore, who we're helping is not important. What does matter is that it appears we have a bomber loose in our city."

"Where?" Sam asked, before studying the map Nell made appear on the screen.

The pint-sized intelligence analyst pointed to a red-marked area. "Local shopping mall. Intel says the bomber is Nigel Peterov. He works custodial at the mall. It's a three story mall and is built like a maze. We believe the bomb is located in the basement."

Eric tapped a button and up popped blue print schematics. "If our intel is correct, the bomb is most likely in the boiler room area. We have no idea what type of bomb or if it's been set to go off yet. For all we know he's just collecting the pieces and hasn't even assembled it yet. If we're lucky. Basically we have absolutely no specific details. "

"What do we know about Peterov?" Deeks queried, asking the question they were all wondering.

"He likes to make things go boom," Nell replied, bringing up a photo of the man along with his information. "He's been linked to the Belsky family."

Callen shook his head. "Mafia. No surprise there. But what's his motive here?"

Hetty tutted. "That would be a most excellent question to ask Mr. Peterov. So do try to keep him alive. We are mostly working blind here, I'm afraid."

"What about the agency we're helping?" Kensi looked irritated. "Can't they give us more information? What are they doing while we're finding the bomb?"

"I'm afraid I'm not privy to that information," Hetty countered. "As I said, we're doing a favor."

Sam shook his head. "Guess we get to save the day. Again." 

Hetty looked amused, but her tone was solemn. "That is what we do, Mr. Hanna."

"Let's get out of here," Callen interjected. "Eric and Nell, we'll contact you once we get there and you can guide us as we go." Callen was already half-way out the door when Hetty stopped him.

"Be safe, Mr. Callen," she cautioned. "All of you."

Callen nodded, but he looked grim. "We will," he promised, then he strode past her, Sam on his heels.

Kensi was about to follow, only she noticed Deeks was still standing in front of the screen. He was fully focused on the blue prints. Kensi moved to his side, touching his arm to garner his attention. She was surprised when he flinched, obviously surprised by her presence. "You coming?"

"Yep." One last look at the screen and Deeks followed Kensi out of Ops.

The four split into two vehicles and made there way to the Shopping Center. The parking lot was packed, which meant they had to play this on the down low, otherwise it would be all too easy to create mass hysteria. Which they wanted to avoid at all cost since, for all they knew, no one was in danger. Yet.

So the team grabbed small backpacks, stuffing them with flashlights, gloves and extra ammo. Sam carried whatever tools he might need if there was a bomb and he had to diffuse it. Hetty had secured a back entrance for them, which would take them through an *Employee Only hallway*. A security guard would lead them to a basement entrance that was for emergency use only. They should be able to come and go unnoticed, for the most part. And they had been informed that Peterov was working on the mall floor, so they would be able to search without worry, not that they still wouldn't be on the look out. The man could run down to the basement on a break.

They made it into the basement without incident, closing the door on the curious guard and locking it behind them. Callen then faced his team as they stood at the apex, bathed in the dim light. He grabbed his phone, intending to contact Eric for directions to the boiler room, only to curse. 

"G?" Sam asked, frowning.

"No signal." Callen glared at his phone and tried again. "Nothing. You guys?"

Kensi, Deeks and Sam tried their phones with the same results. They also tried their ear wigs with the same result. Deeks even went down one corridor, only to discover they couldn't even communicate with each other.

Callen didn't hide his frustration. "So much for hoping we could do this smooth and easy."

"How do we find the boiler room?" Kensi was peering down one of the other corridors that branched off from the apex. Nell hadn't been kidding when she called it a maze.

"By trial and error," Sam replied. "We can't split up if we can't communicate. I'm the only one that can diffuse the bomb. If it comes to that."

Deeks pulled away from the others, standing in the middle of the apex, turning in a slow circle, focused on each corridor. There was six in total. "I can get us to the boiler room," he announced, almost laughing at the identical looks of surpise on the other three faces. "I think maybe even by shortcut."

Kensi moved to confront him. "How?" she demanded, eyeing him suspiciously. 

"What shortcut?" Sam interjected, before Deeks could reply.

"Tunnels," Deeks answered, when he was sure he wouldn't be interrupted. He then looked at Kensi. "I memorized the route off the blueprints. And the tunnels were on there."

Callen looked impressed. "We can't just stand here so let's do this. Deeks, lead the way."

Nodding, Deeks didn't hesitate as he led the way down the third branch from the door, off to the left. He was glad everyone followed in silence, because he needed to focus, letting his mind click through the imprint of the route. He turned left, then right, then led them through a door that opened into a tunnel. They all pulled out their flashlights as the lighting was so dim as to be nearly non-existent. 

Checking his watch, Deeks saw that only six minutes had passed when they stepped out into another corridor and, right before them, was a door marked *BOILER ROOM*. 

"Nice work, Deeks," Sam complimented, clapping him on the shoulder with enough force to make him stumble a bit.

"Let's get this done," Callen stated, stepping around them both and reaching for the door handle. Not so surprisingly, it was locked.

Kensi grinned, reaching in her back pocket for her lock picks. "I've got this," she assured them, dropping to one knee and getting to work. 

Deeks was keeping an eye out for unwelcome intruders, but their location wasn't conducive to his cause. There were two corridors and both curved, making it easy for someone to keep out of sight. He noticed Sam was watching the other corridor and they nodded at each other. "Clear."

"Clear," Sam echoed. 

"Anytime now, Kensi," Callen taunted, making the brunette stop and glare at him.

Deeks shushed any response his partner intended to make. "Did you hear that?" he queried.

Sam joined him. "Hear what?" 

"We're in," Kensi announced, which drew Sam to her.

"I think someone's down here." Deeks drew everyone's attention with that statement. He nodded to the corridor before easing his way into it, gun at the ready. He was followed closely by Callen.

Kensi looked at Sam for direction. "Stay or go?" She knew Sam needed someone to keep an eye out, but at the same time she felt like she should be backing up her partner.

Sam gestured for her to stay. "Callen has Deeks' back."

"Right." Kensi moved to the door, standing guard, as Sam entered. "Anything?" she asked, after a minute passed.

"I've got a bomb," Sam replied. "Not armed. But everything is here."

Kensi moved into the door way, where she could peek in but still keep an eye out for unwelcome guests. "So we need to pack it up and move out."

Sam sighed in irritation. "There's a lot of pieces to move. I'm going to see if I can find a cart or something."

"Hurry up." Kensi was getting nervous. She hated not being in contact with Deeks and Callen and she had a gut feeling something was wrong. Everything had gone too smooth up to this point. It took every ounce of will power she had not to call out to her partner.

Which was probably a good thing, because Deeks was creeping along the corridor, ears attuned to the slightest noise. And that's when he heard it. Footsteps, right behind him. But even as he swung around, something hard and heavy bulldozed into Deeks, body slamming him into the wall. Pain flared throughout his body, centering on the back of his head where it hit the concrete wall. His ears buzzed and his sight grew dim as he slid down into a crumpled heap.

Callen came around the corner just in time to see a giant of a man slam into the Detective. "Deeks!" he called out, gun at the ready as the giant turned. But he hadn't accounted for the speed, or reach, of the big guy and the next thing Callen knew, pain was exploding in his face and he dropped like a stone.

"Sam! Trouble!" Kensi shouted, when she heard Callen call out her partner's name. She headed out running, knowing Sam would have her back, only to stumble into sudden darkness as the corridor lights went out. She stumbled again, tripping this time, over a solid object that blocked her way. Unable to see to catch herself, Kensi hit the ground hard.

"Kensi!" Sam was only a few steps behind her, blinking as the sudden dark lit up again, taking in the sight of his teammates all down for the count. He understood why as he took in the sight of the goliath before him. Nell and Eric hadn't informed them that Peterov was a giant of a man. But that didn't deter Sam. He held his gun steady on Peterov, ordering him on his knees. 

The big guy didn't move a muscle.

So Sam fired a shot at his feet. He was relieved when Peterov turned smart and fell to his knees. Sam moved in slowly, reaching for his zip ties, only to find himself knocked off balance by a huge arm sweeping him back. He caught himself but another blow knocked the gun out of his hand, which left him with few options. Sam spun and kicked, landing a hard blow to Peterov's thigh, but it didn't even faze the giant. 

"That the best you got?" Peterov taunted.

"Not even close!" Sam attacked with blow after blow, but the giant blocked most of them. It didn't take long for Sam to realize that Peterov was trying to wear him down, and it was working. Sam stumbled as the Russian got in a punch to his shoulder, knocking him against the wall. 

"Down boy!" Deeks suddenly shouted and, to Sam's disbelief, the Detective jumped on Peterov's back, both arms wrapping around the giant's thick neck.

Sam was proud. But choking Peterov wasn't going to be easy. So he pushed off the wall and moved back in, landing as many kicks and punches as he could until the Russian was the one stumbling, and the distraction of trying to block Sam's hits allowed Deeks to squeeze the bull-like neck until Peterov fell to his knees. Deeks riding him down as the Goliath did a face plant.

At which point Callen and Kensi both made it back into the game, guns trained on Peterov.

"A little help," Deeks requested, as he tried to free his left arm.

"Good work, Deeks," Sam praised, as he lifted Peterov's head so the detective could pull free.

Deeks nodded. "Thanks. You too." He stood up, swaying on his feet, until Kensi slid an arm around his waist to steady him. Which made him hiss in pain.

She pulled back, gripping his arm instead. "You okay?"

"More or less." He pressed a palm to his forehead. He had the mother of all headaches. 

"Sam, is there a bomb?" Callen asked, as he pressed his shirt sleeve to his bloody nose. He was relieved that everyone was okay, and now they had to focus on the job.

Sam nodded before moving to zip tie their prisoner. He needed his set and Kensi's to do so. "There's a bomb, but it's in pieces. Before you guys took off to mess with Peterov, I found a couple of carts. We can use them to load the bomb and Peterov."

Callen was relieved. "Sam, is the bomb safe to load?"

"It's fine. Nothing is hooked up so it's safe," Sam replied. 

"Good." Callen turned to Kensi. "Why don't you and Deeks go back to the boiler room. While you load the bomb, Deeks can bring the other cart back here and we'll load up Peterov. Then you and Deeks can head back to the cars. Bring them to the back door and let Hetty know mission accomplished."

Kensi nodded. "Sounds like a plan." She patted Deeks on the shoulder. "Come on, partner."

They headed off, Deeks limping a bit. But when Kensi shot a worried glance his way he smiled, brushing off her concern. They had work to do and they did what they had to do. Four hours later, Peterov was in Federal custody, the bomb was disposed of and the team was back at the mission.

Hetty greeted them with a smile. "Job well done, everyone," she praised them. 

"Deeks saved the day," Callen countered. 

"So I understand." Hetty moved to Deeks, who offered a tired smile. "Good work today. You should be proud."

Deeks shrugged, hiding a wince when even that tiny movement made his head and body ache. "Just another day in the life of and LAPD liason." He made the snarky comment, because he knew it was expected of him. And, right on cue, everyone chuckled.

Hetty patted his arm. "That said, I do believe you have all earned a peaceful afternoon. I should think everyone will be able to catch up on their paperwork. With the exception of Mr. Deeks."

"What?" Deeks stared at Hetty in constertation. Her cryptic comment scared the hell out of him. Especially since she was singling him out. 

"I want you to go home and rest," Hetty countered. "You look a little worse for wear."

Which meant Sam had sold him out about getting body slammed by Peterov. "I am a little sore, Hetty," Deeks allowed. "But once the Advil kicks in, I'll be good." Although maybe he had some brain damage after all. Hetty was offerering him the chance to go home and he was arguing to stay put and do paperwork.

Hetty shook a finger at him. "Go home, Mr. Deeks. I want everyone to be well rested over the weekend."

"Why? What's up?" Callen queried. Asking the question they all were thinking. Because it had just become obvious, Hetty had something planned for them. And the odds were, they wouldn't like it.

"Come Monday, you'll be tested," Hetty announced, getting straight to the point. 

Kensi looked like she was about to have a panic attack. "Tested? For what?"

Hetty smiled, looking like the cat who ate the canary, which boded ill for the team. "IQ levels and memory retention."

"Why us?" Callen countered, looking offended. "Are we being punished?" 

"Not at all, Mr. Callen." Hetty frowned at him. "I'm sorry. Apparently I didn't make myself clear. Everyone in this building, myself included, will be tested. The only exceptions being Mr. Beale and Ms. Jones. I already have their scores on record. They test out every six months."

Deeks couldn't help himself. "Why would they do that?"

Eyes dancing with amusement, Hetty replied. "Because they can. That said, everyone, but Mr. Deeks, get to work. Then go home and rest and relax. Monday will be an interesting and busy day." With that she turned on her heel and glided away as silent as a shadow.

"This is not good." Kensi had turned pale and was starting to hyperventilate. She stared at the others, eyes wide. "Is there a way to study for an IQ and memory test?"

"You are way too competive, Kens." Deeks couldn't help but laugh, even as he reached out and squeezed her shoulder, hoping to help her relax. 

Sam shook his head at her. "Let it go, Kensi. Just be cool. You'll do fine."

Kensi glared at him. "Are you patronizing me?"

"No." Sam glared back. "I'm trying to help you chill out. Those tests are no big deal. The only geniuses here are Eric and Nell, which you already know."

"A betting man would add Hetty to that list," Deeks piped up, because he was positive the tiny woman was smarter than all of them put together. He moved to sit at his desk, only to gasp as pain jolted through his side, his head, and his shoulder simultaneously.

Which prompted Kensi to pull him back to his feet, ignoring his protests. "I'm taking you home, like Hetty said. And do not argue with me or you'll wish Peterov had squashed you like a bug."

Deeks, knowing a threat when he heard it, merely followed instructions as Kensi snagged his bag for him then guided him out of the mission and into her car. He even let her belt him into the passenger seat. Her behavior was totally out of character, and Deeks realized she was seriously shook up about the upcoming tests. So much so, that she didn't say a word when he turned the radio station to Country, just to see how out of it she really was. "You can't fail an IQ test, Kens," Deeks said, quietly.

"I really hate tests!" she snarled as she braked hard for a red light. "Why is Hetty doing this now? I bet it's your fault."

"My fault?" Deeks hadn't seen that one coming. "Why would it be my fault?"

Kensi poked him in the shoulder with one finger. "Because you're the one with the stupid memory!"

Now Deeks was offended. "It's not a stupid memory. It's an awesome memory. You wish you had such a great memory." He didn't add that sometimes he hated being able to remember things in such detail. There were things about his childhood he wanted to erase, but they stuck with him, vivid and intense. Sometimes he relived moments, word for word in his dreams. 

"Yeah, whatever." Kensi was, obviously, not impressed. "When we get to your place, you're going to test me."

"On what?" Deeks could not believe how freaked out Kensi was about this. "You can't study for an IQ test. Or a memory test, for that matter."

Eyeing him with suspicion, Kensi remained silent the rest of the way to his place. But the moment Deeks was inside and settled on the couch, she turned on him. "You've taken an IQ test before, haven't you? And memory tests."

Adjusting the pillow behind his head until he was comfortable, Deeks then locked eyes with his partner. "I'm tired and sore. I'm going to nap, shower, eat and go to bed. Tomorrow I'm going to repeat sequence. I suggest you do the same. Maybe Sunday we can hang out and watch a movie and eat pizza...or something." Movie night tended to be on Friday nights, once a month, but he was too beat and feeling beat up to be good company tonight. Kensi wouldn't be any better with her ongoing freak outs.

"I'll be busy," she huffed, frustration radiating from her very pores. "Studying!" Kensi strode to the door and was halfway to slamming her way out when she stalked back over to the couch. "Call me. If you need me. You know what I mean." Turning smartly on her heel, Kensi was gone before Deeks could respond.

"I know," Deeks whispered, before closing his eyes and drifting off to sleep.

***

Monday turned into a quiet and tense day. Kensi was the first to arrive, only to sit and bury her nose in her laptop. Sam was next, Mr. Cool and relaxed. Callen showed up with bacon and coffee and Deeks arrived last, a box of donuts in one hand and a giant coffee in the other. 

"Hey guys," he greeted, setting the box down in front of his partner. "Earth to Kensi." Deeks poked her in the shoulder, stepping back quickly when she flung her fist in his direction. "Don't maim the guy that brings you chocolate donuts."

"Shut up, I'm studying!" Kensi growled at him. 

Deeks laughed, opening the donut box when she pawed at it with the hand that had tried to slug him a moment ago. He placed a chocolate donut in her palm then left her to go back to her frantic studies.

Callen was perched on the corner of the desk, watching. "She doesn't really think she can study for an IQ test, does she?"

"She can hear you," Kensi replied, after swallowing a mouthful of donut. "And, yes, I do think you can study for an IQ test. I looked it up on the internet."

"Okay then." Callen chuckled, reaching for a powdered donut before sliding into his chair and grabbing a folder from his inbox.

Sam glared at his partner. "You need to lay off the donuts," he warned.

Callen didn't look up from his folder, he simply gave Sam the finger.

"That's my favorite hand sign," Deeks joked, as he grabbed a filled donut for himself. He knew better than to offer one to Sam. The big guy had a fondness for Bran muffins, but he frowned upon anything donut related. Deeks couldn't imagine his life without donuts, or double chocolate chip muffins. 

"You need to eat more eggs, Deeks," Sam commented, as he watched the Detective devour his sweet breakfast. "Actually, you need to up your proteins at every meal. Lots of fish and steak and chicken, to go along with all that fat, sugar and oils."

Callen frowned as he listened. "Why aren't you picking on Deeks for eating donuts?"

Sam snorted. "He can use the extra calories."

"Hey!" Deeks was offended. "Don't start with the *Deeks you're getting scrawny* crap again."

"You're not getting scrawny," Sam shot back. "You're already scrawny. You need to put a good twenty pounds on them bones."

Deeks scowled. Sam had been on him for the past few months about gaining back the weight he had lost after being tortured. It wasn't his fault he hadn't exactly felt like eating after having his teeth drilled. Dental surgery hadn't been fun either. He knew he was down a few pounds, but Sam was becoming a broken record. "I'm just naturally lean," Deeks countered. "I'm a lean, mean, fighting machine." And he dared Sam to deny it. The big guy had been working with Deeks for the past few months, teaching him hand to hand Navy Seal style. Deeks felt the difference in his body and in his self-confidence. The moves Sam had been showing him worked well with his own street fighting style.

It was Callen's turn to snort. "And by lean you mean skinny," he stated.

 

"Karma is a bitch, G," Sam interjected, before Deeks could respond. 

 

"Meaning?" Callen shot back.

 

Sam shrugged. "Keep eating all that bacon and those donuts and your cholesterol might not blow up, but the rest of you will." He blew out his cheeks, demonstrating a fuller face.

 

Callen glared at his partner. "Are you saying I'm fat?"

 

"You said it, not me." Sam was fighting a smile, winking at Deeks as he waited for Callen to respond. He didn't have long to wait.

 

"I am not fat! I'm solid!" Callen exclaimed.

 

Sam did not look impressed. "Yeah? You've gained five pounds since last month." He was totally getting his friend back for the *husky* comments he'd teased him with a few months ago.

 

Callen was seriously offended now. "Of muscle. I gained five pounds of muscle!"

 

"If that's what you need to tell yourself," Sam conceded, fighting a chuckle. As Callen turned almost red, he burst out laughing. "I'm just messing with you, G. Although I am serious about too much fat and sugar. Too much of anything is bad for you."

 

"Like too much noise while I'm trying to study," Kensi snapped, glaring at the three men in turn. "Seriously! " She pointed at Sam. "You have too many muscles." Her finger moved too Deeks. "You are too skinny." She then moved on to Callen. "And you -- "

 

Hetty chose that moment to appear before them, a stack of folders in her hand. "It's time to start the tests. IQ testing first." She placed two folders on each desk. "When you finish this, bring it to my desk then go to the boat house for the Memory test. There's no specific time limit, but I would expect everyone to be finished by lunch time." Waving a hand at the folders, Hetty smiled and said, "Begin." 

 

Deeks stared at the folder Sam passed to him, his focus on Kensi. He wondered if she really thought he was too skinny and if she preferred men who were more bulked up than he was ever likely to be. 

 

"Deeks." Sam tapped on his shoulder when he didn't respond.

 

"What?" It took Deeks a moment to realize Sam was trying to get him focused back on the test. He grimaced, apologized, then opened the folder. He could find out more about Kensi's taste in men, later. When she was less focused on the stupid tests. So, picking up a pen, Deeks got to work.

 

He finished first, closing the folder and getting up and heading for Hetty's desk. He handed over the test then made his way outside. He wasn't looking forward to the memory testing, but the sooner he did it the sooner it was over. 

 

Four hours later the team were sitting outside of Kensi's favorite burger place. Since she had been the most freaked out about the tests, they had all decided to let her pick where to eat. For Deeks it was simply a normal, every day occurrence. When at work they always took Kensi's car. She, almost always, drove, and she always picked where they had lunch. Except for his first day back to work after the Siderov incident. That day Kensi had let him pick where they went for lunch.

 

"I failed the tests," Kensi bemoaned, before taking a huge bite of her bacon burger. 

 

"It's not a fail-pass thing," Callen reminded her.

 

Kensi scowled at him. "Of course it is. And all of you finished way before I did."

 

Deeks risked patting her on the shoulder. "The only reason you finished last is because you reread every question half a dozen times."

 

"You shut up!" Kensi snapped at him. "Mr. *I finished first*."

 

"Kens, you need to chill." Deeks wasn't going to let this go, if only because it was freaking him out seeing Kensi being so freaked out. "Stop psyching yourself out. You know you're smart. Let it go."

 

The glare she sent his way had Deeks pushing his chair back about three feet. Just far enough that she'd have to stand up if she wanted to hit him. Thankfully, Kensi focused her attention on her burger for the next few minutes.

 

Sam started telling them about his daughter's school play when Kensi interrupted him.

 

"Why do we have to wait until Friday to get our results?" Is Hetty trying to make me crazy?" Kensi was practically pulling out her hair in her anxiety.

 

"It'll be Friday before we know it," Callen countered, attempting to calm her and failing. Lucky for him, their phones went off simultaneously. 

 

Deeks got to his first. "We have a case," he announced, joyfully. Without the distraction, he was pretty sure Kensi would suffer a melt down. Rising from his chair, he tossed a ten on the table for a tip, then he hauled Kensi to her feet. "Can I drive?" He knew she'd refuse, but it was fun teasing her.

 

Kensi scowled at him. "Are you brain damaged? My car, I drive. You know the drill."

 

"I'm picking the radio station," Deeks sing-songed, knowing it would get her riled. 

 

"When donkey's fly!" Kensi shot back, fishing out her car keys. She paused to stare up into the sky, shielding her eyes against the sun. "Nope. No donkeys." Grinning, Kensi stuck her tongue out at Deeks before sliding behind the wheel.

 

He said nothing in reply, simply content to chuckle as he got into the passenger seat and buckled up. Deeks was pretty sure he could keep Kensi distracted on the ride back to the mission and, since they had a case, she would remain distracted for the rest of the day. Maybe even through the week. 

 

***

 

Friday came faster than any of them expected. 

 

The case they started on Monday, ran the week long. Deeks and Kensi spent four days under cover, ending with Deeks getting hit by a car as they chased after a suspect. Although he continued to insist he had merely rolled over the hood and was fine.

 

Sam kept insisting he was concussed, to the point where he forced Deeks to stretch out on the couch in the mission and rest. His only other option was a visit to the ER, so Deeks made himself comfortable on the couch.

 

He actually found himself drifting off to sleep until Hetty appeared. Deeks sensed a presence and opened his eyes, for once not at all surprised to see his tiny boss standing before him. "We got the bad guy, Hetty," Deeks informed her. He was starting to feel a bit loopy and he was pretty sure it was from the triple dose of pain relief Kensi had made him swallow.

 

"I know, Mr. Deeks." Hetty smiled as she draped a blanket over him. "A job well done. All of you."

 

"Thanks," Callen replied, dropping down into the chair across from the couch. He sighed in contentment as he relaxed into the cushions. They were all tired and aching. Just not as beat up as Deeks.

 

Kensi moved to perch on the arm of the couch, at Deeks' feet, her eyes locked on Hetty's face. "So, do you have our test results?"

 

Hetty smiled, nodding as she waved a hand at Nell, who came scurrying forward with an armful of folders. Hetty accepted them then shooed the analyst off. "Here are your results". She handed them out, explaining as she did so. "The scores and what they mean are all listed. You may share them with each other, or not. Your choice. I will, however, say this. One of you scored as highly gifted. And one of you tested as having a truly eidetic memory. If one believes in such a thing. And that person will begin working on honing their memory skills starting Monday. We'll work together for one hour, each day, after work. As work allows. You will see the notation on your paperwork." Looking quite pleased with herself, Hetty turned sharply on her heel and glided off. Only to reappear a moment later.

 

"Silly me, I forgot to mention." Her focus turned to the Detective. "Mr. Deeks. I've been giving it some thought and I've decided that we will begin working on your language skills. Your Spanish is more than passable so we'll simply work on expanding it. And I know you know more Japanese than you let on, so we'll expand on that as well. But I think we'll add Italian and Russian to the mix. Mr. Callen can work with you on Russian, as time allows and I'll test you."

 

"Awesome," Deeks drawled, wishing he could sink into a hole and vanish.

 

Hetty patted him on the shoulder. "We'll start next week." This time she walked away and vanished.

 

Deeks moaned and covered his face with the blanket. The Karma gods must be pissed at him today.

 

"Finally!" Kensi, exclaimed, sounding both excited and terrified as she stared at the folder in her hand. 

 

"Aren't you going to open it?" Deeks prompted, as he dragged the blanket back off his face. "You've been waiting all day."

 

Sam snorted. "You mean all week." He was standing next to Kensi and he nudged her shoulder. "Go on. See how you did already."

 

Kensi nodded, then heaved a shaky sigh before opening the folder. She scanned the contents then, a moment later, she smiled. "I did pretty good. Better than I expected. Sam?"

 

"I happy with my results," the ex-Navy Seal replied. "How about you Deeks?"

 

"Not so bad," Deeks replied, glancing at the results before closing the folder and letting it rest on his chest. He was more than willing to close his eyes and drift back to sleep.

 

Callen looked pleased as he studied his own results. "So I guess we all did well."

 

Kensi nodded. So, who scored as highly gifted? And who's spending an hour a day with Hetty, honing their memory skills? Because it's not me."

 

"Me either," Callen allowed, looking pleased. 

 

"Sam?" Kensi queried.

 

Smirking, Sam drawled, "Yes?"

 

"It's you, isn't it?" Kensi reached for his folder but he tucked it behind his back. "Which one is it? IQ right? Because Deeks is the one with the freakishly good memory."

 

"It's not me." Sam laughed as Kensi gaped at him.

 

She turned he surprise on Callen. "And it's really not you?"

 

Callen shook his head. "It's not me." He turned to look at Deeks.

 

"Oh my God!" Kensi almost shrieked as she snagged Deeks' folder. She moved quickly out of reach when he tried to get it back, triumph turning to concern when he moaned and cradled his head and his ribs when his attempt to sit up back fired on him. "Are you okay? Lie back down." Hands on his shoulders, Kensi eased Deeks back against the cushions. "I think you need to go to the hospital."

 

"I think...not." Deeks felt like he could breathe again, as the pain eased into simple throbbing. "Now give me my folder back."

 

Kensi's sympathy faded fast. "Not happening." She stood up, taking the folder with her. But before she could open it, Sam snagged it from her, returning it to Deeks. "Hey!" Kensi protested, glaring at Sam.

 

He shook a finger at her. "Play nice. It's his choice if he wants to share his scores with us."

 

"Thanks, Sam." Deeks appreciated having the big guy on his side. But seeing the defeated look on Kensi's face, he found himself offering her the folder. No point in denying what they had already deduced. Since it wasn't one of them, and they had already admitted it, that left only him. He wasn't going to lie to them. Not about something like this. More importantly, he wasn't going to lie to his partner.

 

"It's Deeks," Kensi confirmed, wasting no time in taking the folder from him and scanning the contents. "His IQ score is 147."

 

Sam chuckled. "Didn't Eric say his IQ was 146? That makes Deeks one point smarter."

 

Callen was laughing now too. "We totally have to rub that in."

 

"Please don't," Deeks begged. He looked over at Kensi, expecting her to join in the teasing, only to find her glaring at him. "Are you mad at me?" She sure looked mad, and Deeks was boggled. He couldn't, for the life of him, figure out what he could have done to piss her off now. He wasn't doing anything but lying on the couch, suffering. Surely his pain wasn't making her mad at him.

 

"Why didn't you tell me?" Kensi demanded. And, yep, she was well and truly pissed.

 

Deeks sighed. "Tell you what?"

 

Kensi shook the folder at him, looking like she was about ready to hit him with it. "Tell us that your IQ is high enough to make you highly gifted. You're a freaking brainiac, Deeks. Yet you go around acting like the class clown most of the time."

 

"If I had told you that, would you have believed me?" Deeks struggled to sit up, ignoring the pain in his body, because now he was the one who was pissed. "No! You would not have!" He answered his own question before they could. 

 

"You make it a point not to show that side of yourself, Deeks," Callen quietly interjected.

 

On his feet now, Deeks turned to the team leader. "You're right. And I do that because it's better to let people think I'm not smart enough to get out of my own way. Because then they don't see me as a threat. They don't focus on me. They get distracted. All things that work in my favor when I'm undercover. And when I need to play the smart guy, I can." He paused to take a breath, then mumbled, "Not that they're paying attention anyway." And he couldn't help that remark. Couldn't help feeling just the tiniest bit sorry for himself. He felt he had earned that right, even though it was by choice that he let people believe he was nothing more than what he appeared to be. A laid-back surfer dude, without a care in the world. 

 

Kensi moved to him, placing a hand on his arm, making him look at her. "I know you're smart," she said softly, almost apologetically. "I didn't mean it like that. I'm just...I guess I thought you'd share something like that with me. We're partners."

 

"That's right. We're partners." Deeks shook off her hand. "I didn't think I had to prove I'm not an idiot to you. I am a lawyer. I passed the bar. That's a clue, right?" He was feeling pissed and offended and he knew he was over reacting, but he was tired and in pain and he couldn't seem to stop himself. He wished Kensi had just left it alone. Of course it was Hetty who had set this all in motion, making it a point to let them know that one person had tested out and genius level. And some day, Deeks would confront Hetty and ask why. But today was not some day. Today he was going to go home, sleep for the weekend, then hit reset before coming back to work.

 

"I'm sorry." Kensi blocked him when he tried to walk away from them.

 

Deeks sighed. "Look...can we just forget about it? I'm going to. I just want to go home." Once again he tried to leave, only to be blocked by Sam. Deeks glared at him. "Really?"

 

Sam looked chagrined. "Look...I want to tell you I'm sorry too. You're good at what you do, Deeks. So good you've even managed to distract us with your smoke and mirrors routine. I'm pissed at myself for not catching on sooner. It's my job to see the things other people miss. But I didn't. Not with you. And I'm sorry."

 

"I'm not looking for apologies." Deeks realized it was his turn to explain things. To make them understand. "I'm not like Nell and Eric. What they do is not my thing. They're good at what they do. I'm good at what I do. It's just different. And, to be honest, the few people who do know about my IQ either weren't the least bit impressed, or couldn't stop harassing me because I choose to be a cop instead of a rocket scientist. I'm doing what I want to do. A high IQ doesn't matter. To me. So...it shouldn't matter to you or anyone else. Okay?"

 

"Okay." Callen clapped Deeks on the shoulder, but gently. Obviously remembering he was a bit worse for wear right now. "Fair enough. I don't envy you those private lessons with Hetty though."

 

Deeks moaned. He'd forgotten about that. "Shoot me. Please."

 

Callen laughed. "Sorry. I'm not getting on Hetty's bad side." He shuddered. "Been there, done that. You're on your own, Deeks."

 

"Thanks a lot," Deeks bemoaned, but he smiled to let Callen know he was just teasing. He was grateful to the guy for catching the hint and moving on. 

 

"Deeks!" Eric was at the upper level railing, waving at him.

 

Rolling his eyes, Deeks moved towards the stairs. "What's up?"

 

Eric held up a tablet. "Hetty wanted me to set you up with a tablet and show you a few hacker tricks. "

 

"Why?" For the life of him, Deeks couldn't imagine why Hetty would want him to learn such a thing. Not that he didn't know his way around a computer, when motivated. But, really?

 

"Because now that you've let the cat out of the bag, I believe it's time to push you out of the box you've put yourself in, Mr. Deeks." It was Hetty who replied, appearing out from behind Eric at the railing, making the analyst jump and squeak in fright.

 

Which made Deeks laugh. Which, in turn, made pain stab through his head and ribs and suddenly Deeks was hunching over.

 

Then Kensi was at his side, guiding him back over to the couch and making him sit. "I think he needs to go to the hospital, Hetty."

 

"I think you're right, Ms. Blye," Hetty replied. 

 

"Not right," Deeks protested. "I'm fine. Really." He stared up at Kensi then at Hetty, finding no sympathy there. So he looked to Callen and Sam. "A little help, guys," he pleaded.

 

Sam shook his head. "Sorry, Deeks. I agree with them. You're not looking so good. Come on." Carefully gripping Deeks by the arm, Sam hauled him to his feet despite his protests. Sam leaned in to whisper in Deeks' ear. "It's the hospital or Hetty and Eric. Your choice. I'm sure you'll make the *smart* one."

 

Deeks scowled, even as his lips quirked. "Hospital it is!" He called out, knowing Hetty would hear him. That woman could hear a pin drop a mile away. Deeks was sure of it. 

 

"A smart decision, Mr. Deeks," Hetty replied, confirming Deeks' belief that she had eyes and ears everywhere. "Take care of yourself and keep me updated on your condition."

 

"I'll make sure he does," Kensi stated, moving to Deeks' other side. She didn't take his arm, but she did hover and it made Deeks happy that she cared enough to do so.

 

Sam guided Deeks to Kensi's car and got him buckled into the passenger side. "Callen and I will follow you guys there."

 

Deeks shook his head, instantly regretting it. Tiny explosions of pain were set off and he rubbed his temples, hoping to ease the ache. "You guys don't have to come. I'm just going to convince Kensi to charm the Doc into giving me the good pain meds, then I'm going home and sleeping the weekend away."

 

"We'll tag along anyway." Sam patted Deeks on the arm then closed the door.

 

"You doing okay, Deeks?" Kensi asked, as she started the engine.

 

He sighed, sensing that he wasn't going enjoy his time in the ER at all. Kensi looked seriously worried about him, and Deeks didn't like that. He didn't want her to worry. "I'm good, Kens. Just tired."

 

She nodded, but didn't look like she believed him. Still, she put the car into drive and eased them into traffic.

 

The next four hours were a blur for Deeks. He dozed on the way to the ER. Found himself escorted in to see a Doctor in record time, only to learn from Kensi that Sam had flashed his badge to a nurse and she had been impressed enough to find a Doctor to take care of Deeks ASAP. Only, to hear Callen tell it, the nurse wasn't impressed, she was intimidated. Either way, Deeks had been examined and told to take it easy for the next couple of days. He had heavy brusing in his ribs and left shoulder and a possible concussion. The doctor gave him a prescription, that Kensi filled at the drive through drug store on the way to Deeks' place, and now he was tucked into bed, feeling clean and warm after a hot shower, and a bit hazy from the pain pills.

 

Kensi was lying next to him, on top of the covers, flipping through the channels on the TV.

 

"You don't have to stay," Deeks whispered, because speaking in his normal voice required too much effort.

 

"Go to sleep," Kensi ordered, eyes focused on the tv.

 

Deeks didn't argue. "Okay." He didn't want her to go anyway. 

 

Kensi dropped the remote and looked at him. "You're giving up that easy?"

 

"I'm smart enough to know I'm not gonna win once you've made up your mind about something," Deeks responded, and he was rewarded with a snort-chuckle and Kensi's fingers combing through his hair. A win-win for Deeks.

 

"Go to sleep," Kensi repeated.

 

He closed his eyes, letting himself drift off to the feel of her fingers soothing the ache in his head. But, being Deeks, he had to have the last word. "Goodnight, Fern."

 

Kensi shifted until her lips were pressed against his ear. "You're smart enough to know I'm going to make you pay for that. When you're feeling better, genius."

 

"Wouldn't have it any other way, Fern," Deeks replied, as he let sleep claim him.

 

THE END


End file.
